My Three Kids Music: Songs

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Santa’s Big Fat Ass

Rudolph called in sick on the night of Christmas Eve,
So Santa called the local temp agency,
And they said, “We’ve got no reindeer, but will a donkey do?
He’s a little bit overweight, but he’ll work real hard for you.”
Saint Nick just scratched his beard, and he told them real sincere,
“If it’ll get these toys delivered, I’ll use a three-legged steer.”

So tonight, across the sky, sleighbells ring and a donkey flies,
Bringing Christmas cheer all across the land,
‘Cause you can’t help but smile when you see them speeding past,
Eight little reindeer, and Santa’s big fat ass.

Now, there was no time to waste; he had to bridle up all the deer,
Load the sleigh with toys, and get his fat ass in gear.
Cringle sure missed Rudolph, but he was glad the donkey came,
‘Cause that beast could really move – he didn’t play them reindeer games.
And when the night was over, tears filled Santa’s eyes,
‘Case he could barely bear the thought of kissing that ass goodbye.

So tonight, across the sky, sleighbells ring and a donkey flies,
Bringing Christmas cheer all across the land,
‘Cause you can’t help but smile when you see them speeding past,
Eight little reindeer, and Santa’s big fat ass.

No, you can’t help but smile when you see them speeding past,
Eight little reindeer, and Santa’s big fat ass.


WRITERS: Debra Foster, Heather Cowles, and Steve Sutcliffe..

My Three Kids Music P.O. Box 121962 Nashville TN 37212
Phone: 615-891-3614 my3kidsmusic@comcast.net